Jervis Cottonbelly & Los Ice Creams vs. Juan Francisco de Coronado, The Proletariat Boar of Moldova & Prakash Sabar from CHIKARA Sword of Destiny
Post by Kevin Ford:
This was a match from the year long “Challenge of the Immortals” tournament CHIKARA held in 2015. Cottonbelly’s team represents Crown & Court while Coronado’s team represents The United Nations. Hijo sings “Real American” as he and Coronado lock-up. Coronado pulls him by his cone to the corner. He whips him across the ring but Hijo goes up and over. He monkey flips Coronado for multiple one counts. He monkey flips Coronado once more. Coronado gets pinched in the buttocks after avoiding a corner attack. Hijo sends him face first into the canvas and lands a running hip attack. He pulls a golf club and golf ball out from under the apron. Jr. distracts referee Bryce Remsburg. Hijo wants to hit the ball out of Coronado’s belly button, but Coronado rolls away. After some showboating from Jr., Sabar gives him a variety of armdrags. After a leg lariat he goes for the Bronco Buster. Like the tag match from earlier, Coronado cuts him off. Boar easily wins a test of strength with Cottonbelly. Cottonbelly kicks his arms away, so Boar jabs him in the throat. Cottonbelly dropkicks him, then rock-a-bye’s Boar into a side slam. Cottonbelly teases a dive. Boar avoids it, so Cottonbelly stops and then comes off the apron with a crossbody. Coronado dropkicks Hijo face first into the corner. The United Nations cut him off and beat him down for awhile. Cottonbelly tries coming in, but is intercepted and tossed out. Hijo is able to kick all of the United Nations from the corner, pinch Coronado’s buttocks, and tag in Cottonbelly. Cottonbelly disposes of the Bloc Party and points at Coronado Hogan style. He offers Coronado a free punch. Cottonbelly ducks and airplane spins Coronado, knocking down Boar and Sabar when they charge. He sends Boar and Coronado head first into one another. Cottonbelly runs the ropes into a Frankensteiner on Boar. Sabar spin kicks Cottonbelly. Boar gives him a FameAsser. Hijo kicks Sabar to break the pin. Coronado German suplexes Hijo. Jr. breaks the cover. Boar misses a Gore on Jr. and hits the floor. Jr. backdrops Coronado onto him. With nobody to stop him, Sabar looks for a Bronco Buster on Cottonbelly. He misses and Cottonbelly puts him in a grapevined ankle lock. Sabar taps out at 11:32. The crowd ate this up but it was mostly six guys goofing off. Mileage will definitely vary on this one. **
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